Orphan Court

Today was actually a very nice day.  We woke up on time and had a nice relaxing time before having to leave for the orphanage.  Dina had a very difficult time getting to sleep last night.  She obviously understood that she was leaving this situation.  We had to pack her things last night.  That didn't help.  But over all, I think our attitude is what guided her emotions.  We kept things very calm and positive.  She is so aware of the world around her.  If I had been sad and emotional, she too would have.  It helped that once we arrived, there was a birthday party for one of the orphanage workers.  She turned 80 today.  Brent asked our translator about why someone would work at 80 years old.  She said their pensions are very poor, therefore many people work until late age.  I admit to having a selfish thought about her being there.  I like that Dina is with her "grandmas."  

The translator told Dina that we had to go to work but would return for her as soon as was possible.  She didn't seem to thrilled, but not sad.  She is such a big girl  I think it also helped that she had a few things to show off today. She is so proud of the outfit I had on her today.  Everyone made comments how American she looked... so international.  Which, I found funny because we look at THEM as International.  Dina also boasted about her new toys.  We gave her big kisses and hugs and I told her she could go join the party in the next room over.  So, the transition went great.  

We left there for orphan court in the countryside.  It is quite a long drive.  Dina was born in a hospital in that court's jurisdiction, thus that particular court.  I was so thrilled to be there again, though.  I felt such warmth and friendship from the "judge."  I wish so badly we could finish our next court date there.  However, because we stayed in Riga with Dina, this is where we are considered t reside.  Therefore, we attend court in Riga.  

When we got to court, there were three ladies from the  area along with the judge.  They were seated at one side of the office and us, on the other.  I felt immediately relaxed and welcomed by the board.  After introductions, we were informed of a most pleasant surprise.  Tow of the ladies on the board are actually familiar with Dina's mother!  One is the teacher of Dina's older brother (7th grade) and the other a kindergarten teacher.  I guess Dina has a sibling born in 2007 also.   This little boy also was born with a minor birth defect.  He is a bit behind, physically on one side of his body.  But is rapidly catching up.  Her older brother is on the exceptionally bright side of learning.  We were told that the mother is an excellent, dedicated mother to her children.  They said she is a very exuberant, happy person.  They said she seems very stable in her life when you meet her.  After knowing her a bit better, they learned of her childhood in an alcoholic situation.  Therefore, she has some dysfunction from that life.  She is a very nice and caring person, she just makes very bad choices in men.  She is unable t work a full time job due to her youngest child being at home.  She works as a shop girl and other small jobs.  She is originally from Riga (as are Dina's grandparents).  She moved to the country side about the time Dina was born.  

As for Dina's father, they believe he is the same man who fathered Dina's younger brother.  However, it is not stated on her birth certificate.  Dina's last name is actually the last name of her mother's first husband.  Dina's oldest brother has her mother's maiden name.

I admit that hearing the women speak of Dina's mother brought tears to my eyes.  I thanked them for speaking so highly of her and for telling me of her.  Okay, I was nearly full blown crying at this point.  I just could imagine how difficult life is for her.  I know she wants so badly to do better in her life and for her children.  She just doesn't have the respect for herself nor the life skills to make a big change right now.  I will pray for her and the children.  I think that hearing her story also made me reflect on how hard single parenting can be.  Lord knows that I know.  

I asked the attorney about the laws governing information regarding Dina's past.  The laws prote ct the adoptive parents only.  They feel the adoptive parents have the right to know as much as is possible about the child's past.  However, no information is given to Dina's family without our approval.  I admit, if I could know her mother, I would in a second.  But I know it would be too emotional for her.  So, I will stick to prayers and keep track of her, if possible.  Then if Dina wants to know her or her siblings, she will have the opportunity.  

I am just really big on children being educated along the way with age appropriate information.  It makes it so much easier to talk about when they are grown.  It worked on Robert.  There are times I wish he didn't feel so free to talk about things (sex questions)...  just kidding.  I love having my children feel questions and all topics are open for discussion.  Age appropriate is the key.  

Okay... so, as we were in court, the judge and the Kindergarten teacher both continued to say how close they felt to us.  They could tell from the first minute that this was a good thing.  They thanked us, again for taking Dina.  I just can't say you are welcome.  I feel it is just as normal as having a child.  Just a lot more paperwork.  I am absolutely, totally fond of those two women.  They are so authentic and caring.  I hated to leave them.  I want to be diligent about keeping up with them and sending them reports on Dina.  They gave us very warm hugs and we left.  Me crying and them happy and approving our adoption.  

They asked us what we felt about the Latvian adoption system.  We both told them, emphatically, that it was above and beyond our expectations.  They asked us to please tell others.  I cannot... ever... say enough good about our experiences.  The people of Latvia have been warm, kind, helpful, and very caring for their children.  I can't wait to tell others.  

After court, we ran an errand with Bruno to anther orphanage in the country.  From the looks of it, on the outside, the orphanage was also very well maintained.  A couple of children came out while we were there.  I liked that they were able to go out to play as the other children in the tiny town.  Normal as possible is always good.  

Well, in closing... we are packed and ready to go.  Yes, I am missing my baby girl.  But I know she is in excellent hands.  I know, without a doubt, that she is loved by those who care for her.  Therefore, I can rest and keep moving forward towards getting her home (maja).  Oh... I have to tell this one other thing... I had my video camera with me at court.  So I asked the ladies if they would like to see Dina.  Well...  the only film I had on that camera were pictures of Dina singing on the toilet (which I found hilarious).  I was so embarrassed and felt like some sort of sicko for a brief moment.  I kept the camera up so her privates were indeed, private...but still...of all pictures to have to show them!  I know they were fine, but OMG!!!  They laughed too, thankfully.  I'll send them a few more appropriate pics later.

Okay everyone.  I have to go now and fill out some paperwork for Bruno  to take to the Embassy tomorrow.  Brent and I need to talk about Dina's name, as it is required for the paperwork.  I am fine with "Dina" as I have used it for the past year.  Brent would like to at least consider a few names.  So, we will.  We are looking at Nina Dee, right now.  I'll let you all know the outcome on the next post.  

Hugs to all!